The Driven Man—Laurence Rupp

How nice that we now have time to talk to each other! The last time we saw each other was in summer and, let me tell you in advance, meeting you on this Berlin November morning, you are looking rather chipper!

I just dropped my son off at daycare and took a quick stroll, from the west of Berlin to the north. This is definitely not Vienna.

We have dedicated this edition of the magazine to the term “failure”. Looking at it from the outside, your professional biography seems straightforward enough. First you attended the Max Reinhardt Seminar in Vienna followed by engagements at the Burgtheatre and the Berliner Ensemble while, on the side, starring in films including some small masterpieces. I suspect, however, that this story is a bit over simplified. Am I right?

Absolutely. When I look at it from the outside, I feel the same way. It somehow reads like that. Life goes on, you’re successful and can be really happy. Unfortunately, inside of me, it doesn’t feel as smooth. I sadly don’t seem to be able to reach a state of calmness one could expect when achieving a goal. The fear of failure is always present, because the bigger these symbolic glass ceilings become, the more pressure builds up. But again, this too is only one way of looking at things. I also associate failure with experiences that ‘have to be made’, like a law of nature.

You say that you are afraid of failure and I wonder whether this sort of attitude has more to do with ourselves and how we deal with such disappointments. Can you relate to that at all?

Interesting. Yes. I would agree with you on that. In any case, I have always been someone who was not good at losing. I had to learn how, because with four brothers you don’t stand a chance. Even if I’m afraid of losing, it’s good to be able to accept it. I believe that failure is given simply far too little space and acceptance. I see this not only in myself but also in others—what kind of fear there is. And on the other hand, striving for perfection and what incredible focus that requires. As a result, we actually cut ourselves down and miss out on the opportunity of putting ourselves to the test. For example, when I start to rehearse I’m constantly aware that it could be a flop. Each time it’s all about attempting something, starting over again, and learning something.

That sounds like a worthwhile experimental formula to follow.

You could see it like that. But it is certainly not very easy to follow through with.

I imagine that, through your work, you might often find yourself in situations that could cause personal questions to suddenly arise. Is this the case?

Wait, one example comes to mind because I just experienced this. While I was working with Marie Kreutzer [the Austrian director and writer of the upcoming crime thriller Vier, starring Rupp], something very special happened to me. We were rehearsing, but as soon as I reached the point I felt confident, she stopped and didn’t find it exciting anymore. She interrupted me and gave me instructions. Sometimes I would rehearse eight completely different versions. Marie offered me so much freedom with this and paid an incredible amount of attention. But what touches me just as much is her trust in me, to have invited me to act. That was quite a moment.

Very clever and sensitive.

Absolutely. It was intense, yeah. That’s the way it can go.

Was there a specific moment when you decided to become an actor or did you stumble into it?

I really stumbled into it. It wasn’t even an option as a profession. My father’s work was project-related throughout his life, so I grew up with constant financial ups and downs. It was really upsetting to me as a child; I found it unpleasant and swore to myself that I would definitely have a job with a steady income. Just for thrills, I applied to the Reinhardt Seminar to check it out and gauge what it was all about there. It was really more of a youth-driven motivation and a personal test. They took me. I was actually surprised because there were people there who would have given anything to have been chosen.

It seems to me that you’re not driven by ambition, but rather by ‘the search’ itself – the desire to kind of try something out.

I agree with you on that. I went to this interview because I wanted to try it out, not because I wanted to pursue this one single plan at all costs. The possibility that they would choose me hadn’t even occurred to me. There was no pressure, I was completely free. I was curious and free of the ambition of wanting to become an actor. Unfortunately, that has since changed. I can no longer flirtatiously presume that this is all simply happening to me. I went through different stages and each one has led me to my calling as an actor. My level of freedom has become somewhat smaller: I am still relaxed, but that is simply the attitude I have and how I am by nature.

Are you happy as an actor?

Yes. I am a driven person, in a positive sense. I don’t find peace in most things, not even in everyday life. When I work, when I am allowed to act and it becomes challenging – that is when I am at a kind of peace and my head stops being loud. My body (and it’s hard for me to just stand around quietly) lets go when I act and is focused.

For you, which is more important, the question or the answer?

Now, my friends would say, “he is always asking questions”. I’m really curious and I go as far as to ask questions even to strangers. There is something that drives me. Questions are an elixir.

Do you think it is important to look for answers?

My questions look for answers. When I find myself in situations that I have to resolve for myself, I need an answer. If I don’t get one, then I really have a hard time dealing with it. The fact that there aren’t always answers or that I can’t demand them was a learning process for me. It is very much in line with my urge to want to get to the bottom of things. But I have observed that letting go works. It just takes some time.

Let’s talk about what’s next. What do you have planned after Barbarians? A small independent film or a theatre role? We know each other well, so you’ll understand why I have to wink while asking you this question.

Marvellous… and yes, you always expect something calculated after a project like this. But I’m not like that. I now have the freedom to choose and my intuition decides what role I want to play. Of course, I’m not free from the feeling that I now have to make very smart decisions. When the right offer comes along, or a person I admire wants to work with me, the moment decides. So, to answer your question completely, I don’t know what will come next.

What remains of Gaius Julius Arminius?

The figure of Gaius Julius Arminius possessed such incredible calmness. He so brilliantly weighed his actions and words before he acted or expressed himself. When I played him that way of being felt so good. I’m just very impetuous in dealing with my thoughts and wording them. Negotiating things with oneself and thinking things over before throwing it around seems like a good path to follow. Privately, as well.

Oh, I like that very much about you. I find it refreshing!

Ok.

This article originally appeared in SLEEK #67, which is available now both in print and digital editions.

Credits

Photography: Maximilian Semlinger

Styling: Stefanie Klopf

Grooming: Paloma Brytscha

All looks by Levi’s